Given these conditions, it’s not surprising that the stability of a mostly lesbian/gay identity over time is relatively low. I don’t know why this is true perhaps it’s because women are more honest or are permitted greater latitude in appraising their sexuality. I reviewed several national studies and found the proportion of the population that reports being mostly lesbian/gay is around 1% to 2%, with more women selecting mostly lesbian than lesbian and more men selecting gay than mostly gay. They are in a quandary and, not knowing how to respond, they might skip the question, mark “don’t know” or “something else,” or just say “gay” even though it’s not true. Their friends might say, “You’re really gay/lesbian but you’re just afraid to say so.” But are these individuals merely holding onto vestiges of heterosexuality for personal or cultural reasons? That is, are they hoping that the right woman or man will come along that will convince them, their parents, their friends, their religion, or whatever is important to them that there is still a chance they can lead a “normal” life?
When mostly gays/lesbians, who have considerable homoerotism, are confronted with choices researchers give to describe their sexuality, they explicitly reject the category “exclusively attracted to the same sex.” They could have responded with “lesbian” or “gay” and they would have been mostly right, but they did not select either one.
